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Literature
Isn't it Absurd - Preventive injustice
The administrative and police forces of a certain town were understaffed. Hence, the town experienced a lot of criminality, taxes were not paid, and honest businesses and individuals suffered.
To solve this, the mayor and police chief met together, appealed to parliament, which then decided as follows:
"Since no thief could be verified with certainty that he or she was a thief, everyone would go to JAIL for a day or a week, depending on his or her personal wealth. In addition, the state would get a portion of every businessman's production IN ADVANCE, because the businessman might have time to hide it, otherwise. The police and administrative staff were excluded, since they were honest, and the state knew their condition anyway."
So it was decided, and people agreed since this was the law.
At some point, though, one person, a young lawyer, spoke to the people:
"What are you doing? Why are you so indifferent to such an absurdity and thievery of your own wealth? This is not right, not ri
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 0 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The clumsy servants
A certain master asked his servants to go out during the night and take something from storage.
He said to them:
"Get candles and matches that I have provided so that you can see, since it is dark"
The servants started discussing among one another how bright the master was and how full of light his house was. The also philosophized about the light, of what it was, of how much it was, of how it was to be measured. Through all of this, though, they did not light their candles.
Since they could not see, they stumbled in the dark on the road to the storage room. On arriving there, again, since the room was dark, they made a big mess, taking things from a shelf and moving it to another. They also broke many things.
Some others took as many matchboxes as possible and lit them all together, trying to make them explode. Still others melted the candles in a small-duration, but big fire, and made sculptures - some of them, attempts at a portrait of their master.
A few of them lit their candles n
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 0 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The vineyard
A certain master hired a man to work in his vineyard.
It was winter and the vines had no leaves on them. So, the hired man, started cutting all the vines one by one.
On seeing this, much damage having already been done, the master asked him in an angry tone:
"What do you think you are doing?!"
"I'm cutting them all, since they are bad. Can't you see they are all dry?", the hired man replied.
Of course, the master fired him immediately.
Then, at the end of summer and start of autumn, the grapes where ripe for harvesting. So, the master hired a new man to help him in his vineyard.
On seeing that some of the vines had leaves, but no fruit (or the fruit was not good), the master asked the hired man:
"Didn't you see that these vines have no fruit? Why didn't you tell me, so that we remove them and plant new ones?"
The hired man replied:
"I saw what you did to the hired man in winter. Besides, some of these ones still have leaves!"
Of course, the master fired him immediately.
"Isn't it absur
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 0 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - Mistaken
"Sometimes, and quite often at that,
Dignity is mistaken for Pride,
Truth for Arrogance,
Humility for Weakness,
Simpleness for Stupidity,
Wisdom for Foolishness."
"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 2 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The road
A new paved road was built through a piece a land. On one side the ground was muddy and sandy with many swamps present, and on the other side it was mountainous with many rocks and bushes.
Now, some people avoided the new road, and instead drove their cars through the muddy, sandy and rocky lands.
"What are you doing?", a man who was driving through the paved road, asked the other drivers.
"Why aren't you driving in this road? It is not a toll road, and eventually you pay the same, and by the damage your car takes, you pay even more if you continue like that. Besides, there are dangerous points, no signals, no bridges, and you may fall or sink somewhere!"
"What are you saying?!", the other drivers replied.
"Do you want to restrict our freedom?!"
The other driver tried in vain to change their mind, but they would not listen.
At that time, some people driving off-road vehicles and horses also stopped to listen.
"See!", the other drivers said to the man driving on the paved road, "They al
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 0 1
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The treasure keys
A very rich man wanted to be generous, so he made several copper keys that would allow one to access his treasure.
He told this to the people, but most of them did not believe him. A few believed him, and became rich, but people did not believe them, either.
Then the rich man made a golden key, essentially a copy of the copper keys. On seeing this, the people fought among each other, not for the fact that it could open up the treasure, but because the key was made of gold.
"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 1 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The professional players
A group of friends from a team of professional sport players was vacationing in a popular tourist destination, outside their own country.
Bored as they were, they asked the locals (who also happened to like the sport they played):
"How about we have a match? Do not worry, it will all be according to rules."
The locals, not knowing that they were professionals, decided to give it a try.
Obviously, they lost to the professionals, but with a large score difference.
So, the locals complained, but the professionals said:
"Didn't you agree to play? Didn't we follow the rules? So, you have no right to complain."
-
A few days later, at another city, the professional players asked the same question to the locals. This time, however, they said among themselves: "Let us win, but not make it so obvious. Let us make them think that they are playing fine, but are simply unlucky."
As they said, so they did - they won, and the locals lost.
However, after learning from a traveler from the previous city
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 2 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - Taxing the flowers
A woman was tending the flowers in her garden when a man dressed in a suit, accompanied by the police appeared suddenly before her.
"You have to pay taxes for the rain water your flowers use", he began to say.
"The water belongs to the community, and your flowers use it - all this without permission."
"Either pay with money, or otherwise, give us 30% of your flowers. Of course, any delay will incur penalties - 5% interest per month."
The woman had stood there speechless, but the man continued:
"You understand, don't you, that this is your duty, both as a citizen, as well as a member of the society."
"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 1 0
When all you have is a battery by elheartista When all you have is a battery :iconelheartista:elheartista 0 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - Hospitality
In a certain village, there lived a rich man. His house was large, and he owned a lot of land and other property.
One day, his brother knocked at the door of his house:
"Please", he said, "my house has been destroyed, and my livestock has mostly perished. Allow me to stay at your house and work for you."
"No", his brother said, "You can neither stay, nor work for me. Go fix your house, and work at your own land."
Then, some years later, his cousin knocked at the door of his house, saying almost the same things.
This time, his rich cousin was somewhat nicer:
"Yes, you can work for me, but you can not stay. Go and rebuild your own house. Once you rebuild it, you can work for yourself, as well as for me, as you desire."
Finally, after some more years, a group of gypsies appeared as out of nowhere and camped at the rich man's house.
"What are you doing here?!", the rich man asked.
He eventually discovered that they had been fighting among themselves, that they lived close to the river and
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 2 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The news
Two middle aged men in their fifties were recovering in a hospital.
Due to their chronic diseases (different disease one from the other) they had to once in a while visit the hospital, either because of a sudden crisis, or to relieve them somewhat of their symptoms.
It happened during one of those days that the doctor entered their room very exited and told one of them:
"I have very good news for you!! There is this new medication which has been found to be effective, it has been tested, and is now available in pharmacies everywhere! It's so amazing that your symptoms will go away almost immediately, you'll recover to a normal life in about a week, and in about a year, you'll also be disease free!"
"Wow!", exclaimed the second patient, hopeful that there would be some sort of good news for him, too. "Do you have any such good news for my case, too?"
"Yes!", replied as enthusiastically the doctor.
"There is this certain mix of plants which has been found to be quite effective. It has be
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 0 2
What does one write when he has no more a 'muse'? by elheartista What does one write when he has no more a 'muse'? :iconelheartista:elheartista 0 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The shepherd
A shepherd lost some sheep in the mountain. So, he left the rest of the sheep in an open place, took his dog, and went to look for the lost ones. He eventually found all of them and returned back very happy, only to find the rest of the sheep killed by wolves."
"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked
"But if that is not enough, what would you say if the shepherd noticed them, only to completely disregard, and not even shed one tear for them?"
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 1 0
Depths Vs Surfaces by elheartista Depths Vs Surfaces :iconelheartista:elheartista 1 0
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The woman
A woman went to a maker of sweets and said to him:
"Make a cake for my dead husband and write the following:"
"To my favorite husband, the great thief and murderer"
The cake maker refused her demand, so she had him arrested, imprisoned and executed.
The same woman then went to the priest of the village and said to him:
"Bless my relations to my husbands and lovers. Bless my children, the little thieves and murderers."
The priest agreed, and the woman had him promoted to the position of bishop. The previous bishop resisted this absurdity, so she had him arrested, imprisoned and executed.
It is said that the priest, the judge and the executor were all among her many lovers, but no one knows for sure.
"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 1 2
Literature
Isn't it Absurd - The party for the nerd
Some pupils prepared a birthday party for a nerdy classmate of theirs.
They enjoyed their party a lot, their friendship, their jokes, their dancing, but their classmate did not.
They brought gifts that he did not like - nerdy as he was - so they gave the gifts to one-another.
Some, being more considerate, though not knowing what he EXACTLY liked, bought some GENERIC nerdy gifts. He did not accept these, either, since they were not related to his PARTICULAR interests.
They went to their homes happy, thinking this was among the best parties they had organized.
Their nerdy classmate went home crying.
And alone.
"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
:iconelheartista:elheartista
:iconelheartista:elheartista 1 0

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Activity


The administrative and police forces of a certain town were understaffed. Hence, the town experienced a lot of criminality, taxes were not paid, and honest businesses and individuals suffered.

To solve this, the mayor and police chief met together, appealed to parliament, which then decided as follows:

"Since no thief could be verified with certainty that he or she was a thief, everyone would go to JAIL for a day or a week, depending on his or her personal wealth. In addition, the state would get a portion of every businessman's production IN ADVANCE, because the businessman might have time to hide it, otherwise. The police and administrative staff were excluded, since they were honest, and the state knew their condition anyway."

So it was decided, and people agreed since this was the law.

At some point, though, one person, a young lawyer, spoke to the people:

"What are you doing? Why are you so indifferent to such an absurdity and thievery of your own wealth? This is not right, not right at all! It may be that there are thieves among the businessmen, and that we may not be able to catch them, but look, we know for sure that the state is stealing in the open and nobody dares to speak. Why do you let them cover their incompetence by this stupid law?"

The people listened to him, but did not do anything. One, though, reported him to the police, which arrested him for "disturbing the public order and entice the public to violence and breaking the law".

"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
Isn't it Absurd - Preventive injustice
Mini-stories from "Isn't it Absurd", one of my short stories.

This story also appears in my free ebook "Melting Colors", www.smashwords.com/books/view/…
(book is also available in iTunes, and other online stores).

I'll be posting the rest in stages in the coming days, but you can read it in whole either at the book link above, or at my Facebook page here: www.facebook.com/elheartista/p…
Loading...
A certain master asked his servants to go out during the night and take something from storage.

He said to them:

"Get candles and matches that I have provided so that you can see, since it is dark"

The servants started discussing among one another how bright the master was and how full of light his house was. The also philosophized about the light, of what it was, of how much it was, of how it was to be measured. Through all of this, though, they did not light their candles.

Since they could not see, they stumbled in the dark on the road to the storage room. On arriving there, again, since the room was dark, they made a big mess, taking things from a shelf and moving it to another. They also broke many things.

Some others took as many matchboxes as possible and lit them all together, trying to make them explode. Still others melted the candles in a small-duration, but big fire, and made sculptures - some of them, attempts at a portrait of their master.

A few of them lit their candles normally, and wondered at what the others were doing. However, the others tried to blow their candles out. They also closed their eyes and said to them: "Do you think you are better? Now you also can not see!", and they tried to steal their materials for their 'fun' activities.

The master, hearing all that noise, saw all of that, without the servants' being aware. Then, on the servants return, he asked them:

"What have you done here? What is this mess? What have you done with the candles and matches I gave you and why have you shuffled and broken the things that I had in storage?"

The servants tried to blame the ones that had their candles lit normally (some of them, having stolen their candles already), but the master knew that they were lying, having seen it all himself.

Of course, he fired all the bad servants at once, but wasn't the bad servants' behavior absurd?

"Indeed, isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
Isn't it Absurd - The clumsy servants
Mini-stories from "Isn't it Absurd", one of my short stories.

This story also appears in my free ebook "Melting Colors", www.smashwords.com/books/view/…
(book is also available in iTunes, and other online stores).

I'll be posting the rest in stages in the coming days, but you can read it in whole either at the book link above, or at my Facebook page here: www.facebook.com/elheartista/p…
Loading...
A certain master hired a man to work in his vineyard.

It was winter and the vines had no leaves on them. So, the hired man, started cutting all the vines one by one.

On seeing this, much damage having already been done, the master asked him in an angry tone:

"What do you think you are doing?!"

"I'm cutting them all, since they are bad. Can't you see they are all dry?", the hired man replied.

Of course, the master fired him immediately.

Then, at the end of summer and start of autumn, the grapes where ripe for harvesting. So, the master hired a new man to help him in his vineyard.

On seeing that some of the vines had leaves, but no fruit (or the fruit was not good), the master asked the hired man:

"Didn't you see that these vines have no fruit? Why didn't you tell me, so that we remove them and plant new ones?"

The hired man replied:

"I saw what you did to the hired man in winter. Besides, some of these ones still have leaves!"

Of course, the master fired him immediately.

"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
Isn't it Absurd - The vineyard
Mini-stories from "Isn't it Absurd", one of my short stories.

This story also appears in my free ebook "Melting Colors", www.smashwords.com/books/view/…
(book is also available in iTunes, and other online stores).

I'll be posting the rest in stages in the coming days, but you can read it in whole either at the book link above, or at my Facebook page here: www.facebook.com/elheartista/p…
Loading...
"Sometimes, and quite often at that,
Dignity is mistaken for Pride,
Truth for Arrogance,
Humility for Weakness,
Simpleness for Stupidity,
Wisdom for Foolishness."

"Isn't it absurd?", the Master asked.
Isn't it Absurd - Mistaken
Mini-stories from "Isn't it Absurd", one of my short stories.

This story also appears in my free ebook "Melting Colors", www.smashwords.com/books/view/…
(book is also available in iTunes, and other online stores).

You can read it in whole either at the book link above, or at my Facebook page here: www.facebook.com/elheartista/p…
Loading...

deviantID

elheartista's Profile Picture
elheartista
vanca
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
Greece
SOCIAL: Blog | Twitter

BOOKS: Smashwords | Amazon (author page)

STORES: Zazzle | CafePress | Ebay (Art) | Etsy

3D PRINTING/MANUFACTURING: Shapeways

PHOTOGRAPHY: Flickr | Panoramio

>>Melting Colors (free ebook on Smashwords)<<

Poet, photographer and artist.

Author of "The Visual Non Visuals", "Passenger Illusions", "Modern Poetry" and and "The Bouquet of Poems", four poetry books in English. Available on Amazon as print and ebook versions (Kindle). The first two and the fourth are also available through Smashwords for various platforms (iTunes, Kobo, Barnes and Noble Nook, Sony eReader, etc).

The books are also available in Albanian as "Vizualet Jo Vizuale" and "Iluzione Pasagjere" (on Amazon as print editions and via Smashwords as ebooks on various platforms).

Comments


Add a Comment:
 
:iconpabloruiz:
PabloRuiz Featured By Owner Nov 14, 2015
Thanks for the :+fav:!
Reply
:iconcutebunny50:
Cutebunny50 Featured By Owner Sep 21, 2014  Student Digital Artist
Thanks for the llama, you kind soul~! X3 I have returned the favor! c:
Reply
:iconbamboogecko:
BambooGecko Featured By Owner Jul 18, 2013
hi hi! Your sister sent me your way because I was wondering how you did her commission calculator page. Is there anyway I could get the codes for that?
Reply
:iconelheartista:
elheartista Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Hello (sorry for the late reply).
Well, I did that by html and javascript.
So, you'll need to do some programming if you want something similar.

If you want to look at the code, just go to the page and click with the right mouse button.
If you're on Firefox on the menu that will pop-up there's a "View page source".

Another way is to download the whole page: windystar.awardspace.com/calcu... on your computer (it also works offline since all the code is within a single document). Then (after you download it), you can open it with a text editor (like notepad) to look at the layout/source code (html tags, javascript, etc).

Now, if you want me to program your own calculator, I might think about a commission (I've not done commissions before, but I guess there's always a first time :) )
Reply
:iconbamboogecko:
BambooGecko Featured By Owner Jul 22, 2013
Hahaha fghkd I can usually find my way around a code but that all looks quite confusing...
How much would you be thinking to do it for me?

I'm not even sure how much I would charge people as it is anyway haha xD It'll take some time for me to figure out
Reply
:iconelheartista:
elheartista Featured By Owner Jul 23, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Well, I was thinking something like $10 (or 1000 deviantart points).

Just send me a note with the details.

^^'
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconruppychan:
ruppychan Featured By Owner Jun 16, 2013
Thank you for the fave ;3; <3
Reply
:iconelheartista:
elheartista Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
:)
Reply
:iconruppychan:
ruppychan Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2013
\o/ <3
Reply
:iconvarshapeterpanda:
varshapeterpanda Featured By Owner Jun 10, 2013  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you for the llama! :)
Here is one for you too.
Reply
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